Penned by my father (via Donkey Chronicles)

What does this statement mean? What is the origin of this statement? What are the likely applications and the inferences or innuendos?

Every human being (except Adam and Eve) has a biological father and mother. Unfortunately due to circumstances beyond the control of the individual some parents decide to abandon their children some even before they set eyes on them. In the latter instance, clearly it is not due to dislike of the individual but the fear and discomfort of responsibility of an unscheduled dependant who came with the natural invitation of at least one of the biological parents (the initiator). Nature is very clever; had sex not been a pleasant experience, most would never have had children because of the fear of taking responsibility. So like a net, the selfish continue to get caught in spite of the clever devices employed to hit and run, leaving the fish and the boom hoping that their escapades would die a natural death.

Whether the conjugation was solicited or negotiated, the one who ends up holding the smoldering end of the stick is the woman. Mother Nature decides that the woman carries the product of the rendezvous for nine months in her womb with the tell tale of their activity whether consensus or not, to be either derided or celebrated by a world of experts; after all, we all are sexual beings so we know what we are capable of. In a free, everything goes society where there are no social or communal laws or mores ; everything goes . Whether the appropriateness of the pregnancy is up for debate or it is cause for celebration depends on the existence or nonexistence and adherent to what is acceptable. If the child is not welcome by both of the parents and the mother is kind enough for the child to live, the parting of ways (of mother and child) can only happen after the child is born. However, if the rejection is from the father and depending on the degree of callousness, and in extreme cases, the very day the woman says, I am pregnant is the last time she or the child hears from him. There goes a runaway father.

One of us mentioned the preponderance of unwed mothers in our land. I would dare say, some people have been making them pregnant; bluntly put they are getting pregnant in conjunction with men. And where are the men that have been jointly creating this preponderance? When the children are born and the fathers do not act responsible, they have nowhere to go but stay where the mothers are, with the attendant legacy but happy not to be a “born throway” since at least one of the partners had (besides breast milk) the additional milk of human kindness and sense of responsibility. “Answer your father’s name” in the crudest and malicious form means, “go look for your father and bear his name”. In the Izon culture, the child bears the father’s name and this sentiment can be a desperate reaction of maternal relatives who are pushed to the wall by the individual.

The most popular and friendly interpretation of answer your father’s name is simply a way of saying one must take responsibility by owning up or standing alone without riding behind another’s wake or coverage. There we see the fear inspiring word called responsibility surfacing again. When men and women gamble with their natural potential advantages as trump cards, the losers are often determined by Mother Nature not by their perceived upper hands. A married man with many children who has trouble feeding not to talk of training them is not a reasonable catch for a beautiful female who thinks she is invincibly irresistible. If she decides to take him away from a disadvantaged contestant and in the end find a baby in her romp, one too many for her conquest whose goal in the game was momentary gratification of a wild and untamed desire; it is her loss. Hence all daughters young maidens must be wise and alert.
Typical of the game of spurious chances where the players hide their motives, the cunning get ahead until natural laws which know no bias brings the game to a decisive end. The fear that, there may not be one besides that which is taken out there to be legitimately mine, and the brazen and often exaggerated estimation of whatever it is that makes one thinks irresistible, prevents the player from asking and perhaps negotiating and receiving a guarantee before a deal or no deal. Understanding that number two , three or four as the case may be is a continuum which ends in infinity; will this deal stop with me and is what I have, enough and stronger than all that may engage me after this conquest in a similar situation in future; should be food for thought(in fact main course and not a snack). After all, soldier comes, soldier goes; what goes up often comes down if there is no strong enough effort to maintain the status quo. What the eyes see do entice and it seems like the bigger the eye the bigger the craving and the recklessness in abandonment with potential dire consequences of a life time of irreversible ride with baggage too heavy for one. The young and the beautiful entice with their strength and beauty and are caught by the lure of greed and power exuding from the strong, rich and famous of the game. Welcome to the real whirl web where each player has eye on the price but fails to note the web that entangles for the black widow’s bite.

Dear female child, shine your eyes. All that glitter is not gold. As a female child you are the custodian of the key to the door of generations to come. Let the men and women who see your beauty and poise, see you as the future mother and grandmother of generations to come and not as some play toy for another’s fancy. The value you place on yourself and the price tag you dare fix upon yourself is what others would negotiate with you. If you think short term, the lease is short but the penalty is heavy and there is no opportunity to reset the clock. A broken egg may be used but it cannot be returned to its former state hence the usefulness is limited. Think wisely, choose carefully and take your time; life is not a shopping spree, neither is it a tasting contest. Experimenting with your body which has no duplicate is not a good idea especially when you are not in total control but just one of the players.Beware of injuries and penalties and your are not the referee; Mother Nature is.

There is a price for those who are faithful and those who wait upon God that made them male and female. It is His idea to make them in such a way to need each other and it is well within His alley to ensure that there is no lack for those who trust Him absolutely to bring about His counsel – “be fruitful and multiply”. Those that trust God but decide to help Him often get into trouble, please remember as you trust Him for the best He has for you.

How and where you find a spouse is where and how you may keep or lose your spouse! How you couple determines how you decouple. I am rooting for you because you hold the keys to the generations and this is a token of my commitment to see you succeed, a contented and happy motherhood.

Akiroro.